Kiss Your BUT Goodbye

How to Get Beyond the One Word That Stands Between You and Success

Brothers Joe and Bob Azelby wrote this book because they noticed how powerfully one little word - BUT - impacts on how people are perceived and therefore how their progression can be limited.

When colleagues, managers, and senior leaders talk about others, they almost always discuss their weaknesses in the same way. They may say something like, “She works hard, but she takes on too many projects and doesn't prioritise.” Or, “He is extremely intelligent, but he's really bad at connecting with others.” The biggest problem with BUTs is that those they belong to usually cannot see them.

Everyone had at least one BUT - what's yours?

The authors say that the key message of the book is - no more excuses. Everybody has a BUT and it's your responsibility to find out what it is and then to mitigate it. This can be a painful process, but ultimately it is only by knowing and confronting your own BUT that you can progress to the next level.

Practical points to guide you

• You can get help in finding your BUT from honest, straightforward colleagues and managers who will not sugar-coat their assessments - the 'truth tellers'.
• BUTs are issues either of aptitude (e.g. lack of a particular skill), personality (e.g. moodiness) or behaviour (e.g. doing things that disrupt the team).
• Many people do not deal with their BUTs because they avoid pain and change.
• By making the effort to reduce your BUT through increased self-awareness and the sincere effort to change, you will gain the help and respect of others.
• Often line managers avoid the issue of the significant BUTs in reviews, preferring instead to focus on smaller weaknesses, which seem safer. So don't rely on your line manager to help you. Instead seek honest feedback from trusted individuals.
• An effective way to deal with your own BUTs is to work closely with someone who has the strength you lack, building your own capacity through learning from them.
• Managers have BUTs too, such as micro-managing, which can make employees miserable. You can increase your own value by acting to counteract your manager's BUTs.
• Developing a workplace culture that encourages frank discussion of everyone’s BUTs can make the organisation more productive and profitable, as well as a better place to work.

"It's important to air your concerns and fears with someone you trust.
When you're honest about how you can change and grow, and where your
weaknesses are, then you open the door for improvement and change."